Eddie Murphy Permanently Sealed Into Fat Suit

Eddie Murphy, famed movie and television comedian, has made the decision to seal himself permanently into a fat suit. The decision is based on his frequent appearances in movies such as The Nutty Professor and Norbit in which he wore a fat bodysuit.

It is widely believed that Eddie Murphy's performance in the movie The Nutty Professor revitalized his career. In that movie, his performance was enhanced by an articial bodysuit with flesh-colored padding and latex bladders. The bodysuit, known in the industry as a "fat suit," is one that Murphy wore again in the sequel The Krumps and again in the movie Norbit. Other actors to wear the fat suit include Martin Lawrence for Big Momma's House and Tim Allen for The Santa Clause.

In an interview, Murphy explained his decision as a natural evolution of his career. "Right now, I am one of the leading fat-suit actors in Hollywood. Except for Tim Allen, nobody else has worn a fat suit more often than me. And when I got the script for Big Bubba Dubba that called for me to wear another fat suit, I figured I might as well just go ahead and stay in it. I think everybody agrees that I'm funniest when I'm in a fat suit. It looks like that's the way my career is goin', so it'll cut down on a lot o' time and hassle later on."

Doctor Nathan Vaks, a leading cosmetic surgeon at the Beverly Hills Institute who will be performing the ground-breaking application, explained the procedure. "The operation will take approximately twelve hours, during which we will be applying the pieces of a high-tech surgical latex filled with a gel simulating fat deposits to Mister Murphy's entire body. The latex will then be sealed together permanently into a single piece. The great thing about the suit is that if Mister Murphy actually does gain weight, the suit will expand with him, enhancing the effect."

Murphy has vowed that all his future movies will be comedies making fun of fat people. His next movie will be Big Bubba Dubba about an overweight Southern black man who moves to New York, followed by Fat People Are Funny, where he will play an overweight black man so repulsive that he is lynched by a rampaging mob. Murphy also announced that he will be creating a new film studio called Fatso Pictures that will exclusively produce comedies mocking the overweight.