Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Record Company Digs Up Tupac Shakur

Originally posted on the now defunct website Newshax.com

HOLLYWOOD, CA - Death Row Records announced plans to dig up the body of murdered rapper Tupac Shakur and use it to produce more music. According to founder and CEO Marion "Suge" Knight, the move is part of their continuing plan to exploit Tupac Shakur from beyond the grave.

Tupac Shakur was a popular rapper in the hip-hop "gangsta" genre when he was killed in a drive-by shooting in 1996. Since his death, Shakur's record label has continued to produce new music and CDs based on his unreleased recordings. The success of these posthumous records has driven a demand that led Death Row Records to retrieve Shakur's corpse.

CEO Knight explained, "It's obvious that Tupac's fans can't get enough of him. We've released several CDs of his work, and even combining his old lyrics with new artists, but we're running out of his original tapes. We've even created a computer-generated hologram to perform on-stage. We need more music, and we think this plan will give us an unlimited supply."

Once Shakur's body is exhumed, Death Row plans to drag it into a recording studio and prop it up in front of a microphone. Their engineers have developed a system of oxygen tanks and bellows that will pump air into Shakur's lungs and manipulate his vocal chords to get him to sing.

Death Row Records added that if their plan works, they will also dig up Shakur's old rival, Notorious B.I.G., to record with him.

1 comment:

Maurice Mitchell said...

Zombie Tupac and Notorius would be a great show. Good fight too.